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Crouch, Touch, Engage
Participatory performance


Crouch Touch Engage is a political scrum, originally employed by the Scottish Parliament in the 18th century (in response to the precious remove of the British Parliament to its people) to keep themselves—the government—honest by simulating the affects of their ruling on their citizenry. Inspired by a 10th century practice of settling feuds between villages via abstracted physical play, the exercise evolved over the course of following centuries as what we can consider a government/governed RPG.


Running three sessions, the calisthenic was performed before parliament meetings and brings elected officials through the pace of governor, citizen, and majority-minority party. The physical embodiment of participation and collaboration was intended, as the scrum advanced, to both sharpen the mind and wear down the body, bleeding out 'misdirected aggression', so that governing may process from a more rational and neutral position.

Participants take part in the practice of the practice of the fundamentals of politics: participation and collaboration.

1. It is comprised of three sub-sessions.

2. The scrum consists of two Packs and a Speaker.

3. To simulate the territory of the government, several kilts were originally laid edge to edge on top of which the scrum was conducted. Today, modular flooring is used as the scrum pitch.

4. The pack will take the pitch, and each member will be assigned the name of a Scottish citizen, as was the practice of the original version. Assuming the identity of an unknown citizen matched a familiar face to the unfamiliar humanity of their public.

5. One participant will be ascribed the Speaker. The Speaker will decree read laws for the citizenry to follow.

6. The Speaker will announce new legislation with the phrase 'Crouch, Touch, Engage', and the pack must comply to the best of their ability. If the phrase 'Crouch, Touch, Engage' does not precede a pack's action, the citizens of the pack will be found to be in violation, and will be removed from the pitch and sent to 'the colony'. Furthermore, citizens will be sent to the colony by the judges' ruling of
non-compliance with the law.

7. Concurrently, the bounds of the scrum territory will shift, and members of the pack must adjust.

8. The first sub-session ends when the minority has become the majority. The majority will elect a new Speaker and will take control of the original territory.

9. 2 Sub-sessions follow.


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